So I recently i wrote about a dream incident with my relationship. I have found peace with this and i shall tell you how. So i at first thought i was falling for another girl, This was brought to me because i had a strong feeling after i had the dream. I have been back at school and have seen the girl in the dream, I did notice an odd emotional attraction to her. But not love. SO when i had confronted my own feelings, i realized that i hardly knew her and that loving her would be absurd. I did know that i enjoyed spending time with her and liked it when she would ask me for help with her Biology work. Then another dream made me finally confirm my feelings. In this dream i was fully conscious for the entire dream. I often dream lucidly. So i was walking out of my apartment when i noticed her crying on the stairs, I came next to her in the most socially natural way and sat down next to her. She rubbed her eyes and said that i shouldnt have to see her like this. I told her it was nonsense and asked her what was wrong. She had told me a story of how her family was treating her bad. I simply smiled at her and put my arm around her and let her cry on my shoulder. The dream slowly ended with my usual astronomy ending.
(Where everything fades into a galaxy that is small enough to hold in my hands, i am surronded by the cosmos and i ponder the most complex thoughts in my mind)
Then when i was about to walk out of my dream into reality she appeared to me again, this has never happened before. No one ever intrudes into my personal mind, but she did. She told me that i was her only friend, the only one who truly cares about her well being, she said she would never stop loving me but would understand the way i felt about her. Then i awoke
In this dream i found closure, I now know that all i want from her and other females that are not my girlfriend is Friendship, really strong friendship. Though i know she doesnt feel this way i will never not feel this way about her. So i hope that if this kind of stuff ever happens to you people, think of what i just had, Before you jump to loving conclusions... Keep in mind that being friends is all you need sometimes.
Well now that, that has been taken care of, I had a fairly teasing week, I keep thinking it is friday. Even today i was terribly misled hahaha. I dont know what i am doing with my life, Honestly i feel like i am running full speed into no where. I have noticed that without a goal for a day, the WHOLE day just feels empty. Thats what has been wrong with this week, No tests, no homework, no specially planned events. It just gets really dull living like that, The worse part is that i cannot set a goal for the day, at least during the week. Like if i want to say that Tomorrow i will treat myself with a nice dinner with my girlfriend. Most people could just do that kind of stuff. Me on the other hand.... Lol i have to coordinate absolutely everything on my own and execute it all alone as well. Being 15 with no drivers permit, or friends with cars... I have to skate EVERYWHERE. So even something as simple as going to a friends house would take too long to pull together. So i live a very dull life.
So goodnight my imaginary readers,
Rated[R]
This picture includes: MewTwo with Mew(Left) Zoarark and Zoara(Middle) and Lucario with Roilu
(Right)
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